The relationship between a mother and daughter is a beautiful thing and yet many times it can be complicated and complex. However, the most meaningful aspect of any relationship is the legacy of love that is shared and passed on from generation to generation. Many years ago I attended the funeral service of a dear, sweet friend. I was so moved by the message of remembrance given by my friend’s daughter that I wanted to share her thoughts with you. 

Her daughter slowly made her way to the podium and very tenderly spoke of the special bond of love shared between her mom and dad.  Their relationship was one of mutual love and respect.  She shared several passages from Ephesians.  

“Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ….”  

Ephesians 5:21-33

This special couple had been married for over 65 years.  As high school sweethearts, they knew from the very beginning of their relationship that they would be together forever.  They were devoted to each other and their marriage but also as important in their devotion was their love for their family.  

As I listened to their daughter speak and share stories, there was a true sense of family togetherness.  As a mother of four children, my friend delighted in seeing her children grow into wonderful young adults building families of their own.  Nothing gave her more joy than seeing her children and grandchildren carry on the legacy of love that she and her husband had created many years ago.

The word, love seemed to resonate through the memorial service, the love of two people sharing a life together, the love of a mother devoted to her family, and the love of faith in Jesus Christ.  

Her daughter shared many stories about her mom, but there was one story that many mothers can appreciate.  My dear friend liked to teach her children many different life skills, one particular skill was the art of sewing.  Sewing was a bit of a challenge for her daughter as she had a mind of her own.  She decided not to listen to her mother’s instructions on how to layout a dress pattern.  Thinking she knew better than her mom, her daughter decided to cut the pattern out her own way only to discover that when she cut the pattern out it was cut way too short.  She soon discovered that there was a big slit up the backside of the skirt of the dress.  Not wanting her mother to discover the mistake, the daughter somehow managed to scotch tape the slit together and never mentioned the mishap to her mother.

But of course, moms somehow know everything!  Whenever the dress was washed, it always came back with a fresh piece of scotch tape connecting the skirt together.  

I wanted to share this example because I believe that many times moms and even dads tell their children to do certain things to avoid the pitfalls of life.  However, when the children decide to go off on their own, making their own choices, they must learn how to deal with the consequences of their choices.  And yet, there are those Godly moms and dads, that quietly understand that these moments are not the time to belittle or get upset with their children, instead they quietly and respectfully guide them without saying, “I told you so…!”  Just like that little piece of tape that said volumes.   Knowing when to hold your tongue and when to speak are the first steps to Godly parenting.

“He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.” or
“Watch your words and hold your tongue; you’ll save yourself a lot of grief.”  

Proverbs 21:23

As the daughter concluded her remembrance, she read from 1 Corinthians 13:4-7.  Now most of us might think of this passage as something that would be read at a wedding ceremony.  However, she read the first passage, and then she read it again replacing the word “love” with her mother’s name.  “My mom was patient and kind, she was not jealous or boastful, not arrogant or rude.  She did not insist on her own way, she was not irritable or resentful, she did not rejoice at wrong but rejoiced at right.”  

Wow!  How powerful was that?  I would like to ask you to read 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7 to your family and see if you could replace your name in those same areas.

“Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 

1 Corinthians 13:4-7

Being a parent calls for unconditional love every day.  God wants us to be patient, kind, gentle, and not rude or arrogant.  As we put our trust in Jesus every day to guide us to making Godly decisions for our family, remember this, “So faith, hope, love abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.”  How are you loving your family today?  Are you showing patience, kindness, trust, or perhaps self-control? The love that you share today may be the remembrance your children will have for you tomorrow. Something to think about. I pray today that you will be a loving parent.

“I give you a new commandment, that you love one another.  Just as I have loved you, you also should love one another.” 

John 13:34 

The greatest gift we can give each other is love!

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