The words you chose to use with your children are more powerful than you probably ever imagined.  Hopefully you chose to offer words of encouragement to your children daily.  “Encouragement is more important that any other aspect of child raising.  It is so important that the lack of it can be considered the basic cause for misbehavior.  A misbehaving child is a discouraged child.  Each child needs continuous encouragement as a plant needs water.  Your child cannot grow and develop and gain a sense of belonging without encouragement.” 

It is also important to note that there is a big difference between praise and encouragement.  “Rewards, prizes, tokens, and lots of praise only offer short term results, they do not help the child develop the maturity needed to cope with life. ” It is our goal as parents to help our children be prepared to handle “life and prosperity”, for instance, those children who are constantly praised may not be able to handle constructive criticism.  They have never been “dethroned” and brought back down to reality. 

Sometimes children need to recognize that they are not the center of attention all the time.  A parent may still be able to offer words of encouragement during a disciplinary moment and at the same time effectively offer “Reality Discipline.”  It takes time energy and effort to do this.  So hang in there and know that in the long run your children are loved unconditionally, have a feeling of belonging, and a sense of being capable to handle life.